Long Distance Friendship Drama

On a usual afternoon, Chinmay (my best friend) asked me on text if we could video chat. Video or messages are the only resort for a long distance friendship scenarios. He happens to work and operate out of Germany and I am here in India. It felt stupid to me at first when asked but then I was like yes ofcourse, its been ages we should definitely do that. 

He called me in the afternoon and this time around he asked me for specific time as well, so I did mention that I have my workout scheduled until 6.30 pm, we could chat post that. He made sure he called exactly at the said time, and I was in my regular chirpy way yapping about my first world happenings in life to which he switched the phone call into a video. And what the hell the video call showed my own house, which meant he was right outside my house here to surprise. Damn, I jumped out of happiness to have him over in India after almost 2 years (all thanks to the pandemic restrictions). These are the small yet so special acts you have done over and over in all these years. These are also the reasons that makes him super special for me.  

The fact that Chinmay is here in person to visit me is happiness and a natural feel good factor. I am still smiling while typing this sentence. To add to all of it, he has come back not just to visit India & all of us but also to get married, is the cherry on the cake. Chinmay, you are most definitely one of the best people I know. I am sure with this new phase of marriage the best in your life is yet to begin. 

Congratulations to you and Ketki. Secretly she has no idea, what she is signing up for yet ;). All I can do is warn & wish her all the best with you. 

Thank you for always being there, even in those times when I want to run away from you and the world around. You have been the blessing the Universe granted me as bonus into this life.  

Desire!

The beginning's are usually humble, 

as the journey picks up the desire multiplies.

Constant semblance & need to do more,

turns our life structure into a puzzle; 

the now looks blurred, while looking back, the time flies.

Scattered essence of burning flames, rush and greed are indulgent, 

they drive us through immeasurable madness unable to apprise;

Ray of hope & opportunity is all around us in an imaginary bubble, 

lucky when a spot found into it and devastatingly deviated otherwise;

The moment when you think, 'I have figured it out and have endless things to talk about...', 

metamorphose into that very moment, 

where barely enough words are found to even begin with;

On one hand, it feels like all of it is in our knowledge and on the other,

there isn't anything that feels even familiar.

Thus, the desire continues its exploration...

to know more and be more !!!

Asmanjas Ki Paribhasha!

Shaam ka samay pure din ka ant hai ya raat ki shuruvaat, 

jaise kisi sikke ke do pehluon ke beech ka antar ho...

apne jeevan ki tulna me sochti hun ke iss antar me hi jee rahi hun kahin,

jitna  kathin hai ek pehlun tak pahunchna, utna hi aasaan hai iss antar me hona...

kabhi lagta hai ke asmanjas ka yeh daur kitna lamba chalega,

koi din aisa bhi hoga jab ek faisley ka saamna kar, aage badhna hi hoga...

shayad aaj woh din ya raat ke beech vyatit hote samay ki vyatha aur peedha bhog rahi hun.. 

apne hi bane sawal-jawaab ke jhund me gum hun,

apne hi bane sawalon me kahin jawaab khoj rahi hun!!!

One Quarter Down!!!

It was just about a quarter ago we all were celebrating the New Year's Eve welcoming the year 2020 with exuberant levels of excitement and zest. Little did we know that this twin year had planned a pandemic of corona virus for all of us at the very beginning of this decade. 

At this point in time, a quarter of this year has already passed away and most of us around the world are locked down into our homes/locations. The prime agenda on everyone's head is #FightTheVirus; which has lead to nation wide lock-down along with a few stringent other actions. The basic idea is simple-- create social distancing and do not let this pandemic spread any further; eventually break the chain. Bas isse jyaada gyaan baatne ki aavashyakta nahi iss topic pe, atleast iss artcile me.

The bright side of the situation is that while most of the human clan have been asked to sit back and relax and by just doing this, the lowered human footprints on earth has allowed rest of the species evidently enjoy and reclaim their space back in nature. Therefore, overall this lock-down thing isn't that bad of an idea.  

Coming back to us humans, currently all the good great plans have been crashed and the simplicity of life just as basic survival has taken over. To be true, secretly I am loving it. There are several good-bad sides of the situation floating all around the internet already... thus, I am not getting into it. Rather want to express my happiness of 'living by your own-self' concept is a pleasure of its own kind.

This quarantine situation also brings my attention to yet another known fascinating concept called 'theory of relativity'. Like it was just about yesterday that we were celebrating the year end at NYE and blabbing around how amazing the year 2020 will be; looking forward to complete 12 months ahead of us to do stuff, beginning of the decade etc etc. Oh! well 3 months later I hear a lot of people complaining about how on earth are they suppose to pass this time, life is so boring etc etc. Certainly a 180 degree change of view in the thought process.

To further clarify, first of all- time always passes in an equal pace, it remain untouched and doesn't care to bother how we feel about it. But our feelings, those totally dependent on our ways of dealing with time. If we are happy it makes us feel the speed of time passing by, though time gives no fucks about how we feel or deal with it. Time shall continue to do what it was doing.... pass by at its regular own pace.

In the meanwhile, until the lock-down continues and our planet learns to deal with the virus situation; I urge all of you to enjoy your own company, cause if you can't do that, do expect others complaining when accompanied by you. Anyway, this too shall pass, lets pass it on with a smile. On that note, I wish all of you a great time to your self as its just one quarter down, we still have rest of year to deal with. :)

Waiting at a cliff, watching the sun settle and time pass by itself. Chittorgarh 2020. Ankita Jain 

Should you be around...

Under the stars... gazing at the moonlight,

life looks easy, just and might;

as the sea waves touch my feet,

the worries wash out and flow away, far away with the fleet; 

let the breeze be the essence,

and letting me walk over the set imaginary fence;

silver colored sand spread around,

gleaming beauties of fire-flies were to be found;

in that moment, just in that moment,

holding the past and spending the present;

this brief life of mine,

working too hard to out-do and shine;

have been thriving and trying to figure out,

little did I know about the actual whereabouts;

yet someday all of it shall be worth it;

to be there and not to be there, at the same time, seems fine; 

Under the stars... gazing at the moonlight,

life looks easy, just and might;

while I wait for the sun to rise, shine & bright;

should you be around,

yet again to let my heart skip a beat.

An Average's Cult

"Be wise to make your choices, remember that every choice is valid and it has its respective consequences." by Mr Devdutt Patnaik mentioned this one of his speeches drawing inferences from the Indian mythological stories. After all a person is nothing but a mix of all the random/intentional choices it made at one or the other time in it's lifetime.

There is common weirdness I observe in the chosen lives of mostly everyone around in the cities.  The foremost factor is to earn yourself a settled lifestyle, which is majorly a standard schedule template, i.e. wake up-work-eat-play-sleep-and repeat... also a few times Netflix & chill too. according to me, as of now this usual life is nothing but monotony that has held its grip over it. It is sad to know when people name it as a certain kind of settled lifestyle.

Really!

Surprisingly, this is what an ideally stated settled life and its style is by the so called norms of the current world. On second thoughts why does the notion of settlement with life has to happen so early upon with anyone or everyone.

Oh well! from my point of view its boring and I will never come to terms that it is absolutely fine to continue living like this for the rest of the time in life. It is such a waste of time living life such a way. Cause if you live like this monotonous way over and over again, are you even living?

This pattern much feels like unsatisfactory and unsettled. And personally, it further scares the shit out of me for sure. There is so much more to do, know, absorb and express... exploring life is an additional bonus for all of us. Yet most of us continue to remain unaware, hold back and be weary of living life. Sad, Isn't it?

Look I don't mean to be advising anyone to get into the adventurous mode like those fancy bloggers/vlogger do. I am sure those set of advises can be found all over the internet in plenty, trust me it doesn't help much if you just scroll down through those advises without acting upon them.

Being adventurous and stepping away from reality is fun for a while and stressful when it becomes medium of escapism. Cause apparently the liaison of being perceived as something you are not is even more burdensome. It also doesn't take you any farther, infact has enough more chances to pull you back.

Sometimes its better to not fix things around. It is even better to sit back and ponder, stare at the sky and wonder (about 'the how' and not 'the why' of a situation). I simply mean to say that it is okay to not be okay. Just know that its not okay.

And in my experience a confused state of mind is always better over a settled mindset. And the time for a settle mind is not so soon.

To find yourself you need to accept and understand yourself first... this is foremost important thing to do. Rest everything will be okay and follow through.

For now live it up one thing at a time. Eventually all your choices will gather up soon for better!!
Yeah, in the end it will for sure sum it up all by itself, until then its all chilled out :). 

At least I did like to think of it to be so.

Chalo bahut global gyaan ho gaya aaj ke liye!!

P.S.: I made an attempt to write down my confusions but guess this article will make you equally confused. Enjoy and leave your thoughts/comments below.  

'Love' is to choose and be!

 © 2013 Ankita Jain, All Rights Reserved. 

‘Love' is to choose and be,

Oh! rather it’s a mended concept coming from a knothole.

It often scares me as you could tap into my conscience...

with that one touch, those eyes staring deep across my soul.

No matter how much it is denied and defied,

your presence around me affects me and makes all my efforts shallow.

There is so much more to know, to express and to absorb... 

and yet we continue to remain unaware, hold on to ourselves and argue.

The catch here isn't that you can't have it your way, it is that you can't have all of it your way.

I believe, there is nothing right or wrong... at the very moment, what you do is do!

Cause 'Love' is to choose and be, 

Oh! rather it’s a mended concept coming from a knothole!!!